Lonely
by Independent Angel
Summary: The Pevensies have departed and scars have formed in their lives. How do they feel? What are they thinking? Read to find out! NO FLAMES ACCEPTED!
1. Susan

What we fight for is worth our lives. How we stay together is what keeps us alive. Just the four of us. Well, that was before we departed. My hands are cold as ice, with a lonely heart. I don't even know how the rest are doing. I can't feel love anymore ; the kind when your family is around you. My life has ended, and the connection is broken. Who am I, you ask? I'm the desperate one ; the one who will do anything to find her other siblings. I am Susan Pevensie.

I always cry in the morning. I'm always thinking of them ; if there was any way to prevent this. What happened, you ask me? One died, one left, and one stayed. You don't get it? Lucy, the youngest, stayed in Narnia, where her heart is still full with unbridle joy. I just hope she still remembers her own sister. Edmund, the second youngest, died. The witch had made an attempt to capture him, and she succeeded. She killed him.

But the one who left, was Peter. I can barely remember her face ; whenever I saw him, my heart would melt ; I knew that we could stay that way. But the moment broke. We departed. But he, he had left me. He went out one night, hearing the news about poor Edmund getting killed, and tried to do something. I waited. I waited for hours. Lucy had gone after him, without me knowing. Then with my eyes filled with tears, a centaur had delivered a note that King Peter had gone missing, and Lucy traveling to Aslan. I broke down that night ; they had abandoned me.

Aslan had make me return to my own world, leaving the others in. My eyes had filled with tears that day. My heart felt so broken. My mother died several years when I returned. My father was killed in battle. I am truly alone. I still remember, whenever I was so upset, or anything Peter hated seeing me do, he would always find a way to make me smiled again. He would remind me of what makes us, us. But those days are gone. The light faded years ago. My dream is destroyed.

But one day, just one day, I would find them again. All of them. Including Edmund. Peter would be unharmed, and Lucy would be able to see us. When is that going to happen? That's when my soul rests. When my eyes close, and I go to that wonderful place. That's a journey worth taking, but there is something wrong. If I remain this way, I will waste my life. I'll spend it on crying over. How will I regain my strength? Is there anyway to forget what happened ; the event that caused everything? I have no friends. But when I die, I will.

I will see them again. 


	2. Peter

The picture had torn months ago. We went our own ways. We live our own lives. Except Edmund. I tried to look for him, and still try to save him. Wrong move. Now, I'm just injured and unable to seek help. I can't see the rest anymore. They probably think I've died. I am the one who left. The one who is trying to always do things right. I am Peter Pevensie.

This happened years ago, and I can't believe I'm still alive. Sooner or later I will die. I barley remember Susan's beautiful face, Lucy's courage and Edmund's trust. I've left them all. It all happened when I had gotten a letter that my little brother has been killed by our darkest enemy ; the White Witch. I looked for Edmund, to see if there was a possibility to save him. Maybe he was seriously injured. But I became the one who was seriously injured. I was riding with my horse, until a dwarf had took aim and shot my right arm. I let go, and fell. I pulled out the arrow, which had nearly gone through my whole arm, and moaned in pain. The horse had panicked and left me, leaving me in the forest. I had found a little village, but found out they had been attacked and left everything. I used it for hospitality.

That's my life now. Just trying to survive and eventually see the girls. But I'll never see my brother, ever again. He's gone, and there's nothing I can do. It's out of my hands. I just feel like falling. Whenever Lucy asked me, "Do you think there's a wonderful place for us?", that was the most ironic question I've heard. I really do think so, and there's going to be one. I hope so. I just hope Ed is watching over us. We were a family, but we're nothing without him.

If life is so complicated and people have to go through something like this, then why bother living it? Everyone is so desperate. So helpless. So alone. I don't even think if I can smile anymore. I just frown, and feel so hurt. I just wonder if there really is a wonderful place. Way better than I think it was when I was 7. Every single day I'm losing faith. I'm losing pieces of my heart. Ever since that first thought about everyone being safe, I can't forget how life is different without all of us. If I ever seen them again, I would definitely cry. I would do one immature thing and not be embarrassed. But the problem of doing that is, Susan would just yell at me, and tell me to stop.

But things are different now.

It's hard to believe that there are people smiling, laughing, and having a great time. But that's not me anymore. I'm the desperate one, who's trying to fight back at what destiny has chosen for me to have. I can't do those things I used to do. I'm lost inside. I'm even tempted to just give up and die. There's nothing even if I do survive. We'll always be missing the one who was lost, but came to our side. We'll be always missing a part of us. I don't even know if either Lucy or Susan has died. Maybe they have. Maybe if I do survive, I'll just find out I'm the last one standing. I'll never see them again. I'll never see Lucy's bright smile, or hear Susan's complaining about me acting younger than she is. I'd do anything to hear that now. To hear what's the difference between right and wrong, even if I have been taught that already. Another thing I'll be never the hear is Edmund's whining. Sure, it's annoying, but the old saying is right ; you don't know what you love until you've lost it. I just hope I'll survive to remember all of them. To remember what happened, what we thought. I know Lucy is happy, since she's with Aslan. I'm not even sure if Susan or Lucy remember me. 

But I'll remember them, as long I'll remember everyone who leaves. 


	3. Lucy

They did whatever it took for me to be happy and safe. They loved me, and protected me. They acted like another pair of parents. But now, at this moment, I only feel fear. That's what happening to my heart. I fear that I may never see them again. I couldn't believe what the letter had said when that centaur have given it to us. Peter's eyes had so much tears when he read it to us. Susan feared that the White Witch might come after the rest of us. Peter tried to save Edmund, but never returned. We waited for hours. I couldn't take it and ran away, hoping I could find it. But what's a 7 year old girl going to do when she finds two heavy men? I am Lucy Pevensie, the youngest sibling.

Instead of finding my older brothers, Aslan, the great lion, had found me, and ordered me to evacuate this area. I wondered why back then, but now as I am a 13 year old teenager, I understand. It's been 6 years. The faces of the great Pevensies are fading. I cried for awhile, that they were taking me away from my family. The only family I have. 3 weeks later, they had given a note that Susan had returned to our world, leaving me alone. Back there, I thought, "Oh, she must be getting some supplies. She'll return." Now, I know what's so wrong with the world. I just don't get one thing ; why is the world this way? Why can't other people just understand other people's feelings? Why is that so hard?

2 years later, after getting the letter, I knew she wasn't coming back. She left for life. Why did she have to go? I know the answer to that one. I only knew when Aslan had overheard me asking myself. He told me, "Lucy, she didn't want to leave. But she knew she had to. Jadis might go after her and kill her. She tried to stay, and even fought back against everyone. She then lost, and she was back to her world." I knew she would think I was filled with happiness. But I'm not. I'm alone, sad, and I cry a lot. Narnia has changed, for sure. Many creatures are crying because of the event. Newsletter have gone out, with a fronting saying, "Pevensies Departed" or "Will they come back or stay apart?". It's all up to faith now. I am praying everyday for us to be together. Are we going to stay apart?

A war is said to be formed. I can't take the sight of it, anymore. Not after since I had to face the dreadful form of me finding about death. Peter had always told me, whenever dad was talking about the war, to never listen to this kind of subject. It wasn't right. Susan had always told me that girls she not even think of that cursed word. She even had made a list of words for the boys on not what to say. Peter had laughed at this, and so did Edmund. But I took it seriously. The list was important to me. Here's the list:

War Death (Die, Dies)  
Hate (or hatred)  
Fail(ing)  
Unimportant Unworthy Idiot Stupid

It was a small list, but I liked it. It showed how much Susan didn't want us to be in trouble. Edmund was the trouble maker, though. But he was always the one to cheer people up when they were sad, or whenever they had a bad day.

Will life be ever the same? 


	4. Edmund

They thought I was gone. They thought I died. But I didn't. I'm just captured.

For years I've been trying to escape the wrath of the dreaded witch, but nothing has happened. Creatures believe the words that Jadis spoke, telling she had finally killed me. That would be the only way for the creatures to stop looking for me. But the ones I worried about the most, was the part when Peter, Susan and Lucy "found out" about my "death".

I'm only used when the White Witch needs her castle clean, her shoes polished or when her other servants are hungry. She treats the others better than she does to me, like giving no food or water. After I clean, she looks me into the icy prison, locks shackles onto my feet and I wait until sunrise.

I guess you figured out who I am by now. It's obvious. I'm Edmund, the poor servant who's treated by dirt by the White Witch.

There's no luck for me. There's not use, no faith. I've tried everything, and all I get it 8 hours of whipping on my back and with nothing to disinfect it. Every night I think about what the others are doing. They must be laughing, smiling, and having a great time. I can't blame them. They think I'm dead anyway. But that will be soon true, if I'm not set free in 7 weeks.

A/N I know, short, but there's not mush to put in Ed's. Sorry. Go ahead, flame. Then I'll cry my eyes out and kill myself! LOL. (I might do the crying thing.) 


End file.
